I Wanna Stay, OK?


I just am going to share a very strong poem by Bukowski. But before that...
You know what? I don't wanna die, OK?
Yeah! Most of the times, life seems too odd and maybe most of us feel despair about it.
However!
I wanna stay here for a long long time with my daughter and wife and everything that makes me feel in comfort. I wanna watch the sundown above the sea while I am drinking my cold big size beer and having some peanuts in warm feelings. When I look left, I'd like to see my love and when I look right, I wanna see my life. That's it!
Death is a silly process. I invite all the medical doctors and biologists to find a way to heal the end-of-life disorder.
I am here!
Deal?

And the poem by the great American poet:

born like this
into this
as the chalk faces smile
as Mrs. Death laughs
as the elevators break
as political landscapes dissolve
as the supermarket bag boy holds a college degree
as the oily fish spit out their oily prey
as the sun is masked

we are
born like this
into this
into these carefully mad wars
into the sight of broken factory windows of emptiness
into bars where people no longer speak to each other
into fist fights that end as shootings and knifings

born into this
into hospitals which are so expensive that it's cheaper to die
into lawyers who charge so much it's cheaper to plead guilty
into a country where the jails are full and the madhouses closed
into a place where the masses elevate fools into rich heroes

born into this
walking and living through this
dying because of this
muted because of this
castrated
debauched
disinherited
because of this
fooled by this
used by this
pissed on by this
made crazy and sick by this
made violent
made inhuman
by this
the heart is blackened
the fingers reach for the throat
the gun
the knife
the bomb
the fingers reach toward an unresponsive god
the fingers reach for the bottle
the pill
the powder

we are born into this sorrowful deadliness
we are born into a government 60 years in debt
that soon will be unable to even pay the interest on that debt
and the banks will burn
money will be useless
there will be open and unpunished murder in the streets
it will be guns and roving mobs
land will be useless
food will become a diminishing return
nuclear power will be taken over by the many
explosions will continually shake the earth
radiated robot men will stalk each other
the rich and the chosen will watch from space platforms
Dante's Inferno will be made to look like a children's playground
the sun will not be seen and it will always be night
trees will die
all vegetation will die
radiated men will eat the flesh of radiated men
the sea will be poisoned
the lakes and rivers will vanish
rain will be the new gold
the rotting bodies of men and animals will stink in the dark wind
the last few survivors will be overtaken by new and hideous diseases
and the space platforms will be destroyed by attrition
the petering out of supplies
the natural effect of general decay
and there will be the most beautiful silence never heard
born out of that
the sun still hidden there
awaiting the next chapter


-Charles Bukowski, from The Last Night of the Earth Poems, 1992

2 comments:

dino said...

ı wanna stay too but wonder otherside!ı'm thinking that sokrat's thought about death ,he said something like that ''fear of death another claim to know that they didn't know ,don't they?''
how do we know would be worse than this:)he said that is shame of ignorance...an alternative view ha!..just comes my mind and love this poem thanks for sharing

Bora said...

Merhaba,
Sokrat ölümden sonra öğrenme sürecinin devam edeceğini düşünüyor. Ben düşünmüyorum. Zaten kendisi inatla ölümü tercih etmiş ve belki de onun hikayesini devleştiren kendisini yargılayan mahkemeyi aşağılayıp fütursuzca ölüme gidişi. Bence ölüm çok ulvi bir şey değil, geri dönülemez bir yok oluş süreci. Yaşam da ulvi değil ama yaşamın sıradanlığı içinde bulunmak harika bir his :)
Bir de korkuyu şöyle analiz ediyorum ben: Bir şeyi bilmiyorsan üzerinde kontrol sağlayamazsın. Kontrol sağlayamadığın şeyden korkar, kaçınmak istersin. Ölüm bu tarife uyuyor benim sözlüğümde :) Ölüp başka bir krallığa göçeceğimiz ise sadece anlatı bana kalırsa. Aslında şu da var ki benim temel motivasyonum ölümden korkmak değil hayatımın bitmesinden kaynaklı üzüntü. Hayatımı seviyorum ve kalmak istiyorum hep :) Bununla ilgili bir şeyler yazmıştım: http://borawriteson.blogspot.com/2009/11/reality.html
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